"Work In Progress." It's a common term among knitters on the web. It's often asked in a rather cheeky fashion, "How many wip's do you have?" for we knitters are known to be irrestibly drawn to delicious new skiens before the old ones have been used for their creative intention.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

How many babies must die?

Nestle found themselves in the news yet again... and they are up to their old habits...

In China, 6200 babies are gravely ill and 4 have died so far after melamine was found in Nestle formula/milk products. And the number is growing.

Melamine... in baby milk.

When will we as consumers stop giving our money to these companies who care only for lining their own pockets with money laced with the tears of dying children and grieving mothers???

Please... boycott Nestle.

Sunday, September 14, 2008


All right... it's been a whirlwind summer with way too much fun... and just the right amount of yarn.

Dorcas Camp was a hoot... a soggy, wet hoot, but a barrel of fun nonetheless. Sadly, I don't hae any pics because my camera died two days before I left. I was able to pass on the fibre-loving bug to 42 young ladies and their moms. Josie was an awesome helper (Hi there!!) and she is one awesome girl. Her grandma had taught her how to knit using the continental method, and she has some mad skills! She passed on her knowledge and so I'm giving it a go. It's a totally different feel, but I think it just might be faster when I get the hang of it. There was plenty of adventure to be had - Mum's van broke down and we were given some kindly help from Carlos at Mr. Lube in Brantford... he asked for a token from Sarnia, but we could only find a knitted bunny to give him. I offered to teach him to knit, but he declined... so the plan is to knit him a hat and send it off. I'll try to get it done and in the mail by next week. Also the week was filled with rain, rain and yes, more rain. On the last night, a massive thunderstorm began at 2am. I prayed for God's mercy, please let it stop. But His mercy was delivered in a different medium, in that the kids slept soundly thru the whole thing. I was shaking like a leaf but they were peacefully unaware of the storm raging around them. There's a lesson in that, no doubt.

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Matthew 6:27

We had an awesome holiday at Fair Havens. There was something for everyone and I didn't have to cook or clean all week. Yipee! It was restful and I found it to be a respite from my emotions too. I'm continuing to walk thru the process of greiving 2 lost babies, and it was such a healing week for me. I spent a lot of time focusing on my spiritual walk with God and I found myself rejuevenated by the end of our time there... ready to come home and focus on the physical healing that needs some tending. The kids had so much fun! There was even a petting zoo brought in one day... with sheep, angora goats and alpaca... I was looking for a pair of sheers!!

And now, we are back to our routine of school. [insert sigh of relief]

I'm looking forward to cooler temperatures and knitting with my new stash! Yipee!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Tiny socks

I knit a tiny pair of socks yesterday.

Red, with a white ribbon.

Perfect for Christmas.

Therapy knitting.

I hadn't been able to knit anything before yesterday... before I knew that Sammy's heart had finally stopped. Anything prior to that was just too hopeful, and I hadn't the heart. But good-bye knitting is easier than hopeful knitting.

The socks were so tiny, and yet, they were so enormous compared to the wee tiny boy that Sammy was.

And so, these tiny socks will be tucked away, as will my hopeful feelings... for I say good-bye to my tiny boy, but I know that it is not final. I will hold him one day.

Oh God, grant me patience in waiting for that day.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Hiding Place

The sunshine was astonishing. The breeze was perfect. The day was as lovely as could be.

The happy sound of my children playing outside was interrupted by a heart-wrenching cry... I ran to the window to see Hannah, lying crumpled and bloody, on the sidewalk. I bolted for the door, not stopping for my shoes. I ran across the grass to where she lay. Gathering her up in my arms, I brought her into the safety of our home.

As tenderly as I could, I cleaned her scraped and bleeding knees. A little ointment and plenty of bandaids helped, but thru her sniffles, she just asked for a cuddle. She just wanted to be held.

Everything within me wanted to love the hurt away. I held her as tightly as I could and I didn't let go until she was calm.


There are moments in life that strike with extreme clarity... moments that are bigger than oneself... moments when it is undeniable that Someone is trying desperately to communicate with us, if we would but listen to that still, small voice...

As I held Hannah, I knew that I myself was being held. When inside, I felt like I was a crumpled mess, I knew I was being held by Someone much bigger than I... Someone who was able to contain all the sorrow and pain... Someone who was not afraid of my tears... Someone who just wanted to love the hurt away. I sat there holding Hannah, knowing that I, too, was being held.

Please take a moment to listen to Hiding Place.

Psalm 32:7
You are my hiding place;
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Long overdue

It's been far too long since I've stopped by... poor, sad, little blog. I'm sorry. Well, here are some yummy knits that I've been working on...

The biggest and best... Mark's 10th anniversary sweater...

Details: Mission Falls merino

I think I could have made the torso a little longer, but Mark is quite happy with it. It's tailored to his hobbit-ish size and fits him so well. I modified the pattern somewhat, as I think some of the instructions got a little lost in translation. I also knit a crew neck instead of a turtleneck, which you can't see in the Garnstudio pattern because of the scarf. I'm really happy with how it turned out...

Next posting...

wee little tomten

(I promise, I'll be back soon)

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Friday, November 30, 2007

Knitting Therapy

I've always loved the therapeutic affect of knitting... the repetitive motion, the feel of soft yarn twisting thru my fingers... there's something wonderful about that. I find it helps me to focus my thoughts and blot out the things that would distract or worry me.

That being said... I've been doing a lot of knitting lately... my yarn could charge me a decent hourly rate if it were my therapist.

I've worked on Mark's sweater... but I've found it to be a restless project. Although I love the man fiercely, I have discovered that I do not love knitting a gazillion stitches in the round. The other night, we settled on the couch to watch a movie to distract ourselves from the emotions of waiting. I measured the sweater beforehand, I knit for the whole movie, and then at the end... I remeasured. How is it one can knit for two hours and end up with the SAME cms???? I was undone... it didn't help that in the movie, the main characters wife lost her baby. It didn't talk about that on the back cover. The knitting and movie were not as therapeutic that night as they should have been.

I'm continuing to work on socks for my dad. Used the YarnHarlot's pattern she did for her dh Joe - a manly man, and a Newfie... so I figured if he liked his socks, my dad might like them too. After several pairs of plain black, I needed a little variety.

My true therapy has been knitting a few baby things. I bought some heavenly soft angora at Spun, my lys. It's soft and white and soothing to touch. I will never hold this baby, but I will have this lovely knitting to touch when the longing arises, and I hope it will soothe the pain with time. It was hard to bind off the last row. It seemed so final. The knitting was done before I felt done... ready to move on. So I cast on again, this time for booties... but I ran out of yarn after the first one was complete. I wondered if I ought to go and buy another skein... or does a project left undone seem more fitting? No amount of knitting will help, I've decided. I just have to wait and walk this thru. I could end up with a whole layette for a baby that will never wear it, and I doubt I will feel satisfied in the end. Proverbs 30 speaks of a barren womb never being satisfied - and though I am not barren, I've sadly lost this child, nothing I can do will satisfy the longing I will forever feel to hold this child. God alone is the one who can calm my heart and fill the emptiness.

Though the loose ends of my baby knitting have neatly been woven in, the feelings of my heart are not so easily dealt with. They cannot be tucked away, snipped off, or buried. I feel a little ragged, and the process of working thru the emotions of losing a baby takes more time than knitting these baby things.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Amazing Grace

I've been trying to figure out how you say good-bye to someone when you haven't even said hello. How is it that you can love someone so much... someone whom you've never officially met, held or beheld.

For 9 weeks, my life was filled with the sweet surprise of a new baby. We were all overjoyed to be having another baby in the family. At my ultrasound last Thursday though, I was told that there was no heart beat... no movement. I was dumbfounded. And I cried. And cried. And cried.

Mark had a dream the night before I went for the ultrasound, that he was in heaven and a little girl he didn't know came up to him and said, "Hi Daddy."

We decided to call our baby Grace.

God's peace has radiated my waiting time, and I'm not worried about any of the "why" questions. I just want to know... how do you stop your arms from aching to hold someone you never will?

Monday, September 3, 2007


Just a quick note...

It's been a wonderful August... and I haven't posted once about it!! Oh dear...

Dorcas camp was wonderful with Hannah and Amanda. Girl time! I was inspired by a number of craft ideas, and I walked away from the week renewed spiritually and emotionally. I came home a better wife and better mother.

Our anniversay dinner with our family and friends was amazing. It was great to celebrate ten years with some of the people who have been there for us, good times and bad, encouraging us and praying with us. I'm thankful to have been blessed with such wonderful parents... and I am doubly blessed to have received such a special second family of in-laws.

Mum Joy and I are starting a Daniel fast this week. It was her suggestion as a kick-off to the year... a time to focus on the Lord, set ourselves apart and seek after Him. A few years ago when I did my 40-day Lenten fast, I realized very quickly how much our lives around food and we seek after it to fill us and fulfill us... but it is utterly incapable of doing so. I want to begin this year focused on God's plan for our homeschool. I want to spend extra time in prayer for Hannah especially... I love her exceedinly but she tests me to my limit... I want a breakthru for us.

I want just one thing in my life... God.

All the rest will just fall into place.

Thursday, August 2, 2007

Strong trees

10 YEARS!!! Wow! I can hardly believe it! Ten wonderful years... sure, some of it was a little up and down, but I love how my mom used to say that storms make strong trees... and our marriage is going strong after all this time because of the lessons we have learned thru the good times and bad. I love this man, more now than ever!

Now for knitting news...

Woo hoo! my Branching Out scarf is finished and all set to block... I even have a little alpaca left for another project... perhaps the cuffs of socks or stripes in a simple scarf... we shall see. For now, back into the stash pile.

I am thrilled with how well it turned out. It's soft and beautiful. It feels like such an accomplishment... my first truly successful lace knitting. (Pictures to follow.)

happy news #2: my ebay parcel arrived with the rest of my Tootsie yarn and so I'm back to the Meadow Flowers shawl. I love it!!! I also got 4 balls of yummy soft yarn that will hide in the stash for just the right project. What will be worthy enough?? hmmm...

Prep for Dorcas camp is under way. We've tested our new tent, assembled our gear... and Hannah is totally thrilled. I'm praying that it is a real building time for us, and that God will bring us closer together.